Thursday, June 3, 2010

Does love exist?

We have heard a lot about great love stories like heer-ranjha, laila-majnu and many others but why is that all the great love stories are incomplete? Why isn’t a happy ending to any of them? If we think of this 21st century we would hear far too many break ups daily then we would have thought of in the entire19th 0r the 20th century. Why are people so unhappy with their love life today? Has love lost its value? Flirting and time pass has become a trend & the big question is Does love really exists?
Media is one of the greatest tools that depict today’s society. Talking of the media television documentaries, newspaper articles and the movies play a big part in portraying today’s lifestyle. The age group of 12 to 35 is influenced mostly by the movies they see, which more or less show their ever changing thinking and their lifestyle. The result being similar movies being released in different languages... Such as the movie based on real life incidence 7/G rainbow colony is remade into Bengali movie Prem Amar. Few such movies that are being remade from Telugu are:-
Happy (Telugu) – Bolona Tumi Amar (Bangla)
Bommarillu (Telugu) – Bhalobhasa Bhalobhasa (Bangla)
Pokiri (Telugu) – Wanted (Hindi)
Gajini (Telugu) – Gajini (Hindi)

One of latest Bengali movie Chirodini Tumi Je Amar is also a Telugu remake. I am not much into Bengali movies otherwise I would have listed few more movies. My point is the latest movies be it Kites, Gajini, New York, Prem Amar or Chirodini Tumi Je Amar don’t have a ending that you usually see in the romantic movies the reason being the movies depict our society and today love has certainly lost its shade.
To visualize it more clearly let me take you to the story of Deepayan…Deepayan, age 28 engineer by profession is working in a software company. He has got everything he wanted in life except one thing that is love…this story will certainly raise questions to many ethical values of life.
One fine evening Deepayan met few of his friends in the pub…who were there for enjoying their night. One of his friend quoted ‘hey! Look at those pretty ladies there. Come let’s go over there’
Deepayan: friends you go…I am not interested. I want to be in solitude.
Friend: cool down deep… I can understand you have broken with your girlfriend today. Everything will be normal…let’s go.
Deepayan: I am not feeling right at the moment…you all go
Friend: listen deep I have a girlfriend but still I want to enjoy, just a time pass you know….moreover you are single now who knows you could get a new girlfriend.
Deepayan: what girl friend? She was not my girlfriend she was my life. In human’s life a person gets only one life and she was my life and she is gone now.
Friend: forget all those deep… it’s all past now you can’t bring her back…life is in front of you and you are not dead you should enjoy your life.
Deepayan: there are few incidences that changes a person’s life forever…and the scar with its pain lives forever. Yeah I am alive but dead from within.
Friend: let’s go out to the beach…there’s no one around at the moment…tell me what exactly happened today…share your pain …you will feel relaxed.
Deepayan: from many days…I was calling her but couldn’t talk to her…today after many such messages she finally took my call. She was not talking properly so I asked her to meet in reply she said she doesn’t want to meet me. She told another person has entered her life and she doesn’t want to be in contact with me anymore. She said that she never loved me. When I forced her to meet she told me that I might kill her or throw acid on her face. She said she doesn’t want to die for that special person in her life now…that’s why she doesn’t want to meet me
Deepayan: (in tears)…  I love her more then my life and she… (Deepayan couldn’t speak anymore and tears burst from his eyes)
Friend: when she said she never loved you…then why are you so sad…she was flirting with you..That’s it…forget her. You will surely get someone who will really love you... (Friend laughed heartlessly)…

Few years passed

Deepayan’s mother: son, see all your friend got married. We have got you so many good marriage proposal but you rejected all. What’s your problem? Why you don’t want to marry?
Deepayan: mother we have talked over it many times…I am not going to marry and that’s final.
Deepayan’s mother: sanjeev you are Deepayan’s friend since school. You are Deepayan’s best friend please speak to him he might listen to you.
Sanjeev: deep…why don’t you understand your mother? She wants a daughter in law in this house.
Deepayan: sanjeev you know it very well. I loved that girl and I cannot love anybody else…so no question of marrying.
Sanjeev: huh! That was just an infatuation…I too had many girlfriend but see I am married now. And I love my wife.
Deepayan: you never had any love for anybody sanjeev… they were all your time pass.
Sanjeev: but I am married now and I am happy with my wife.
Deepayan: that’s because you never had love for anybody …if you could love anybody in the past then you would never be happy with anybody else.
Sanjeev: all this love you are talking about is nonsense…the real love is when you have the guts to marry a girl and love her throughout your life.
Deepayan: I have the gut that’s why I still love the same girl for all these years. And I am ready to marry her any day.
Sanjeev: where is that girl? She has forgotten you long time back. You don’t know any whereabouts of that girl. She might have married a long time back.
Deepayan: may be …she might have got married. But I cannot marry any other girl.
Sanjeev: why can’t you marry?
Deepayan: because I cant love any other girl. Even if I marry any girl I will never love her. So instead to ruining anybody else’s life it’s better that I don’t marry.
Sanjeev: why are you ruining your own life?
Deepayan: my life is ruined the day she left me…
Sanjeev: I told you earlier that she was flirting with you…she never loved you… come over it my friend otherwise your life would be hell.
Deepayan: my life is hell and I don’t want to make anybody else’s life hell that’s why I don’t want to marry.
Deepayan’s mother: enough of your speech…we have got a good girl for you and we are going to met their family tomorrow and you are going to marry her.
Deepayan: mother I have lived all these years for you and father only. Otherwise I would have died a long time back….don’t force me mom otherwise you wont see your son alive.
Deepayan’s mother: God please give him some sense and good will….

Deepayan had everything in life….a good job, money, home, family everything …but he couldn’t bear the mental torture of being single. People started taunting him at his workplace, among friends and even at home….finally one day he succumbed to all this, while going home from office he met with an accident and lost his mental balance. He only remembers the face of the girl he loved…and is often heard with the cries of ‘I only wanted to see you once’.

This story is of a person who loved a girl but this love led him to hell. Only thing he wanted in life was that girl. People say True love finds a way but the only place his love took him is to a life where he was alive but was dead…

Whom would you blame for Deepayan’s condition the girl who left him? Deepayan’s friend who would taunt him for being single? Deepayan’s family for forcing him to marry? Or Deepayan himself for loving the girl?

I can only blame the trend which people call flirting. I don’t blame the girl or anybody else because today flirting has become a fashion. The girl would have never thought Deepayan would take her so seriously. And this trend comes from the movies we see, friends with whom we live and the thinking we develop from our surrounding.
When I was going to my college for the first time my Mathematics tuition teacher told me where ever you go always remember about your background you come from i.e., your roots. You would see different people. You would like to do what others are doing…but whatever you do never loose your genuiniety….so that when you return back, people could see the same person as you were before. This is indeed one of the fundamentals of life knowing who we are and not to follow what others are doing. In this way we can avoid many things that we shouldn’t do and would follow the right path to life. This is all about combating those trends.
And now the big question does love exist visualizing to what happened to Deepayan?
The answer is not so obvious. I would like to clear the doubt with the following words. Whenever you go to sleep spent few minutes to yourself. Think about the day; what you did. Whatever you did was right or you should have done something else. Be true to yourself. If you think you have done everything right you would have a good sleep because you know you have spent a good day. But if you think you have done something you shouldn’t have done then think about the ways you could rectify the mistakes in the very near future. Sooner you realize your mistakes make efforts to rectify it as quickly as possible as Time doesn’t wait for anybody. Love is also analogous to this rule before going to bed think about the person who loves you or whom you love …even if it’s just a time pass for you. Think what you did (speak) to him/her and what the other person do(speak) to you. After thinking from your prospective spent at least a minute to think from other person’s prospective. Try to think yourself from other person’s behalf. If the other person is flirting with you, you can’t do much. But if you are flirting then you will feel guilty seeing the person’s love for you. This is basically a self analysis test. You know you will get the best sleep when you know there is a person who loves you more then anybody else. And if you are not serious for him it’s high time to get serious because true love happens only once and a person is happiest not when he is with the person he loves but when he is with the person who loves him. You will be happy because you know that the person will always love you. If for any reason that person is going away from you…don’t wait go and talk to your love. In love there is never too late… I am sure all your differences will sort out. If everyone spends few minutes to self analysis … I am sure there will be a day…when there won’t be any Deepayan around and I could proudly say yes love exists…and if that day doesn’t come I am sorry to say ….but many more Deepayan would be born to live a life like hell .


  1. It is really sad that girl did this...really heart wrenching!

    1. Huh...don't be support any person who is going through such anguish you should never say " i am sad for you" just with it as it's the path you have chosen for yourself...!!!

    2. I never meant it for that person. I meant it as a girl. It is sad that "someone" who is also a human being first and foremost, did this to another human being.

      For that person who is hurt, yes one should live with this as this all a part of life..!

    3. First of all i must thank you for the effort you made...did you make a plan to read all my posts in a single day?

      about the comment well all i can say is it's part and parcel of life...where there is blind love there has to be a suffering ...!!!


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