Monday, October 31, 2011

Lateral Thinking ...!!!

You cannot grow until and unless you Grow with your thinking…!!!

This document is for all the parents rather than the young generation of this country…whatever I am going to speak in the following lines am sure 9 out of 10 youth will agree with me…whereas am not sure about parents though. You must have heard about the word generation gap time and again…have you ever thought what are the consequences of generation gap or how is it effecting our entire society as a whole?

I am one amongst the million youth of this country and I firmly believe everybody will vote for thoughts when I say the words like Caste ,Culture or Religion are relevant only when we are seeking admissions in any institutions or applying for job in any public sector organizations. You won’t hear about them anywhere else. Even after getting admissions or job your best mate may be from other caste or culture and you never ever give a damn about it either, as the only things that substantiate is whether they share the same frequency as you do. While making friends a person’s caste or culture is certainly not what you look into.
But what about parents? Do they accept your friends/mate the way you do?
i will answer it in the following lines but before I speak anything I must clarify few things…I am not here to criticize our elders or anybody else and this is also true that the story which I am citing may not be applicable for all the parents. I am only trying to make all our elders see the way we see the world.

This story is of a boy named James who was a Malyali Christian and a girl named Bristi a Bengali Brahmin. They both first met in the same organization for which they are working, two years ago. We know feelings are not bounded by any boundaries and when you are in love you seldom care for anything else in this world. Everything was going on well amongst them; thunderstorm arose when they spoke about it to their parents.

Parents of James as well as Bristi rejected their plea and denied of accepting any such relationship. Bristi’s parents started looking for match in their caste where as James parents started convincing James by words his decision would be fatal for their family and it would be very difficult for her younger sister to get married later on.
Both the parents are somewhat right in their thinking but are they taking the right decision?

Bristi’s parents are doing what every parent would want but as per my understanding says they are not taking the right step. They may get an eligible match for her but what about Bristi? Will she be happy? I agree parents will try to get the best possible match for her but the match that is already decided by one’s soul can never be exchanged. She will never be happy in her life. She might agree to her parents to marry someone by killing herself virtually. Her parents would be proud as they would now be able walk in the society with their heads held high. But Bristi’s life would be a hell and with time she might take all the responsibilities of her new family but believe me she won’t be the person she was. Killing the feeling of love from one’s heart is similar to killing a baby in mother’s womb. You will never be able to forgive yourself for the crime that you did, if you see from the others prospective.
Talking about James parents Yes their concern is something that shouldn’t be ignored but are they doing the right thing? No certainly not, they are also doing the same mistake what Bristi’s parents are forging. They are right in thinking about their family and their daughter’s future to be exact but this is where our thinking varies with our elders.
Lateral thinking is what I call it…why do parents think that inter caste marriage is not acceptable? Why do they think that inter caste marriage is a shame and it will ruin their family? Why can’t they accept a relationship the way we the youth accept it? In the end it’s us who has to lead the entire life with a person. If we are ready to accept a person irrespective of all the differences of caste and culture why can’t parents?

The greatest relationship in this world is the one which is bounded by love.
If parents start understanding that it’s love that determines all the relations and not any culture, they would be proud for their ward who had taken a decision to make someone their life partner who is from other culture. They would not worry about anything else like prestige in the society or about younger daughter marriage because whenever they would come across level headed society they would be respected for the bold step of accepting their sibling’s decision.

We talk about integrity, solidarity, unity amongst all the citizen of the country but when it’s time to showcase its evidence why do people take a back step? If you really believe that everyone is equal and there’s no difference between the person who is from other religion, caste or culture than why is there a big no in accepting someone to be your bride/broom?

A word to all the parents: we know you want the best for us but sometimes you have to leave on us to choose our own steps because what is best according to your views may not be the same for us as we may have other ideas. If you believe that you have given us the right morals throughout our life than be pretty sure our decision will never be a shame for you…!!!

You talk about developing/growing a nation but be Cent percent sure you cannot develop/grow a single individual even if it’s your own child until and unless you grow with your thinking …!!!


  1. WOW!!
    Brilliant thoughts... you know my parents were very particular about my friends too.. I being a Brahmin and I asked them once do people wear their castes so that I can recognise them!!


    1. Yeah...i know you are not single here...there would be millions in your path including me...

      and i also know most of today's youth will agree with my's a post for the parents...
      i love your response "do people wear their castes so that I can recognise them!!"


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