Saturday, March 5, 2011

Be yourself....a dilemma

Sometimes we want to do something but end up doing nothing…sometimes when we need to speak we don’t utter a word and when the time passes by we keep on ruing of not speaking anything. Sometimes we feel something but the reality comes out to be entirely different.
I am here with a piece that has all the uncertainties of a person’s feelings and all the anomalies related with it.

Soul: you were thinking of that girl?
Sandepan: yeah…don’t know much but there is something that makes me attracted towards her.
Soul: what do you like in her?
Sandepan: she is expressive; extrovert…frank likes to spend time with her friends…has brain along with the beauty which is a rarity in itself…looks good when is happy…horrible when tensed…whatever it may be I want to see her all the time…has a good voice…I like the Bengali numbers she sings…she is also a number 5….she is…
Soul: hold a sec…how do you know she is also a number 5?
Sandepan: from numerology…how do you calculate any person’s number from the date of birth, time of birth and the place of birth am I right?
Soul: yeah…
Sandepan: suppose a person is born on 12-02-1989…how would you calculate his number…adding all the numbers isn’t it…like (1+2+0+2+1+9+8+9)= 32 now you have to sum the two digit number to get a person’s number that is (3+2)=5…I know her date of birth she is also a number 5…I don’t know the time and place of birth so am not so sure about how much number 5 influences does she have in her life…but from the date of birth one thing for sure she would have a good compatibility with me.
Soul: impressive…but instead of doing all these calculations you should go and speak to her.
Sandepan: I don’t want any of her friends to know about my feelings for her as am sure if anybody knows about this there would be unnecessary hikes about it and there’s a possibility my feelings would be a part of their fun.
Soul: speak to her when she is alone.
Sandepan: but whenever get to see her she is always with her friends…
Soul: why don’t you call her up and speak…messages what do you say?
Sandepan: she doesn’t usually respond to my messages and I feel cheap speaking about my feeling via cell phones…
Soul: what do you actually want?
Sandepan: you know I don’t believe in flirting and hurting as such I want to know about her…like what does she wants from a person she could love, likes, dislikes, nature and everything about her so that the day I do speak to her I may be the person she wants to see in her beloved.
Soul: that means you want to change for a girl?
Sandepan: don’t take that way…when you are in love it’s not about changes it’s about how you could sacrifice the undesirable necessities from yourself so that you could be with her.
Soul: any changes…you have thought till now?
Sandepan: I am a vegetarian…I would become non-vegetarian if she accepts me…It reminds me of the Bollywood movie Rehna hai tere dil mein…but am sure I won’t be puking after eating.
Soul: do you have enough time for that?
Sandepan: I know I don’t have much time…I don’t have much scope either…but before speaking anything to her I must ensure we stay in the same location.
Soul: why?
Sandepan: because there is no point speaking to her and then going away…and long distance relations seldom survives.
Soul: who told you that?
Sandepan: you might be talking of the age old relations but for a new relation to prosper its necessary for us to be in the same place…you might not agree with me…as you don’t have a brain to think for you.
Soul: I don’t understand why people think of brains when in love…any ways…your first motive is to know her…I am not asking you to speak about your feelings but you could speak to her about herself?
Sandepan: I don’t think she is much interested to speak about her…
Soul: what made you say that?
Sandepan: I told you she doesn’t reply my messages.
Soul: so you want her to reply to good mornings & good night?
Sandepan: no but I sent her a message stating I don’t want to be your friend with whom you can share your happiness therefore you would seldom find me beside you when you are happy…but whenever you are unhappy & if you look around you would find me…she didn’t respond
Soul: everybody is not so philosophical like you…she might not have understood what actually you meant.
Sandepan: no that’s not the case…I know she is worried about something for a long time…I asked her many times but she never replied…I even asked her to change her weird looking photo from the social networking site but she never responded.
Soul: it may be that she wants you to personally speak to her?
Sandepan: I don’t think so…or else she might have given me any indications….
Soul: you want indications? Why don’t you go and talk?
Sandepan: things are not like what it seems to you…I have a feeling that she knows I like her.
Soul: so what are you waiting for?
Sandepan: a confirmation of a location…
Soul: till that day you won’t be speaking anything to her…and you believe she will accept you?
Sandepan: I don’t know …but whatever may be case am not going to speak to her in presence of her friends…
Soul: coward…
Sandepan: you may call me whatever you want to…you don’t understand…she doesn’t like me…doesn’t even respond to my messages…doesn’t even speak about herself…
Soul: who told you this?
Sandepan: I think so
Soul: that’s why I say…don’t even think of your brains when in love…
Sandepan: I don’t know what should I do…
Soul: I have only one thing to say…if you keep on waiting…you time will never come…that’s my opinion now it’s upon you and your weird brain to decide what you have to do.
Sandepan: thank god my brain is sleeping and all the thinking is controlled by my heart or else I would be in more dilemmas after today’s conversation.

This is the common scenario for all those who are in love…what should they speak, what would be the appropriate time…what if she rejects? People often say consults your best ones when you are in similar situations…but the person who knows you best is you yourself as such…if you could be calm enough and think about it you would get the clue I suppose.
My words for all those who are in love there is never an appropriate time…the appropriate time is when you realized you have feelings for somebody…love is never a thought process it happens when it has to. Brain doesn’t have any control over it. The main thing that signifies your love is you yourself…never try to be what others tell you or follow the footsteps opted by others…if you are in love and if it’s true…it will find a way.


  1. Wait - wait- wait - - I don't understand this thing called wait.. why cannot we listen to our heart and do what it says!

    Completely second your last lines there :)

    1. agreed again... wait can only cause you to lose what you deserve...

      thanks...for going by my thoughts...!!!


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